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May 19, 2006

American TV Viewers as a Whole are Morons

When phenomenal and ground-breaking television programs like Sons and Daughters get cancelled after only ten episodes in favor of something like According to Jim, something is wrong. Here is a short list of television programs or types of programs that I have only watched briefly, but never will again, mostly because I think they are beyond retarded. Unfortunately, I am sure this list will expand:

American Idol
Give me a break. This is nothing more than televised karaoke. Just because you can belt out a song does not mean you are talented, no matter how good you are. This show is more about embarrassment than singing anyway. Moronic.

Survivor
In any of its ridiculous incarnations. This show is nothing but exhibitionism and voyeurism, but it's not even good exhibitionism or voyeurism. Let's put a group of beautiful people in a situation where they emaciate, sometimes run around naked (and emaciated) and stab each other in the back. It's like setting up cameras at a concentration camp or televising Christians fighting lions from a Roman coliseum. With today's perspective, who in their right minds would want to watch that? Absurd.

Redneck Television Shows
I don't even remember what they're called, but they're on Comedy Central and various others. It may just be the all the mullets that annoy me. No, it's also the way they talk and the way they dress and the way they carry themselves -- like they're all inbred. "If you watch this show . . . you may be a redneck."

Celebrity Sports
I don't care what the sport is -- Celebrity Bowling, Celebrity Skiing, even Celebrity Bash-The-Fuck-Out-Of-Each-Other -- I refuse to watch it. After all, how far down the alphabet of celebrity status do you have to be in order to be on one of these shows? D-List maybe? It's a cry for help. I won't bite.

Awards Shows
The only one that counts (and that I watch) is the Academy Awards. The others are all "me toos" that can be safely ignored. Even the Academy Awards gets annoying, though, especially if the host is not quick on their feet. I think Jon Stewart did a great job this year.

And now, on the flipside, here is a show that you will watch if you are anything but a half-wit:

The Daily Show
Brilliant, ascerbic wit. Not only that, but you learn what's going on in the world even as it is being mocked. To get a taste, go to The Daily Show Website. Always smart, never pandering, this show will be difficult to top, as it's well on its way to being rated the best comedy ever.

I do not know the authorship of the exceedingly funny animated GIF at the top of this entry. However, if the author contacted me, I would be more than happy to give credit where credit is due.

Posted by Nathan Dickson at 08:11 AM | Comments (0)